14 February 2009

VOGUE Strikes a Position

Even in the most dire of economic crises, if one looks hard enough, one can still find a job. Word on the street (the one the girls that have given up on their Gladiator sandals take) is that the Wicked Witch of the Fashion World- Anna Wintour is hiring. Twoher assistants are said to be flying the Vogue nest -and its designer closet- which they supposedly of have access to. (yeeeah, right).

I'm not sure what the want-ad reads but anyone who saw "The Devil Wears Prada" and/or ever met anyone in the Fashion Magazine World would probably write it as follows:

Needed: Spineless, non-confrontational girl willing to work long hours at very low pay. Must have extremely sharp eye for fashion, whilst working for people who think they know more and are better than you. Must be able to carry several garment bags in one arm during a Starbucks run and take criticism like a fledgling model. Must dress as if you work somewhere glamorous/get paid an actual salary, even though job entails mainly photocopying, lunch-orders and phone-answering, with occasional trips to return unwanted items. For the two times a year the industry is actually glamorous, you will be merely adding taxi superintendant and ticketing agent to your repertoire; pulling 16 hour days and must look even better than usual in higher heels. Men need not apply, as office is filled with insecure women who thrive on estrogen only and are not sure of their capability of intimidating anyone with an appendage between their legs- gay or straight.

Good luck to all those girls inspiring to get into the fabulous world of fashion, or in these times of economic despair, anyone desperate enough to apply anywhere.


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