14 February 2009

VOGUE Strikes a Position

Even in the most dire of economic crises, if one looks hard enough, one can still find a job. Word on the street (the one the girls that have given up on their Gladiator sandals take) is that the Wicked Witch of the Fashion World- Anna Wintour is hiring. Twoher assistants are said to be flying the Vogue nest -and its designer closet- which they supposedly of have access to. (yeeeah, right).

I'm not sure what the want-ad reads but anyone who saw "The Devil Wears Prada" and/or ever met anyone in the Fashion Magazine World would probably write it as follows:

Needed: Spineless, non-confrontational girl willing to work long hours at very low pay. Must have extremely sharp eye for fashion, whilst working for people who think they know more and are better than you. Must be able to carry several garment bags in one arm during a Starbucks run and take criticism like a fledgling model. Must dress as if you work somewhere glamorous/get paid an actual salary, even though job entails mainly photocopying, lunch-orders and phone-answering, with occasional trips to return unwanted items. For the two times a year the industry is actually glamorous, you will be merely adding taxi superintendant and ticketing agent to your repertoire; pulling 16 hour days and must look even better than usual in higher heels. Men need not apply, as office is filled with insecure women who thrive on estrogen only and are not sure of their capability of intimidating anyone with an appendage between their legs- gay or straight.

Good luck to all those girls inspiring to get into the fabulous world of fashion, or in these times of economic despair, anyone desperate enough to apply anywhere.

13 February 2009

Funeral For Domino

It is with a heavy heart that we must say goodbye to one of the best decorating magazines I have known. This March 2009 issue of Domino will be its last. The website, too will face sudden death. 

In honor of the magazine that merged home design with shopping; home goods with chic; and eco with practical, here is a bit ripped from the Robert Frost poem 'Home Burial':

"There, you have said it all and you feel better.
You won't go now.  You're crying.  Close the door.
The heart's gone out of it: why keep it up?
Amy!  There's someone coming down the road!"

"You—oh, you think the talk is all.  I must go—
Somewhere out of this house.  How can I make you——"

"If—you—do!"  She was opening the door wider.
"Where do you mean to go?  First tell me that.
I'll follow and bring you back by force.  I will!—"

                                                         Robert Frost

Domino, if I could bring you back by force I would! Farewell my friend!

12 February 2009

Valentine's Day Killer

For some, including me, one of the most dreaded holidays approaches- Valentine's Day.  Even if you have found the perfect partner and live each day in bliss, this holiday reeks. It cheapens every poem, every song written about love and stuffs it into a heart-shaped cardboard box. 
Valentine's Day doesn't feel like a celebration of but rather like a forced feeling of love, making you express something or making you feel you need to have love or, if you're alone, that you're the only one that doesn't. You're not. 

Telling someone you love them shouldn't be mandatory. Who wants a card and chocolates that Hallmark told him/her to get you? Everyone knows that unexpected gifts mean more. 
For Saturday, I am sending Cupid my own Anti-Valentine in honor of everyone that feels like I do. A dozen black roses= Dead. from deadflowerflorist.com and I'll do something nice for my honey on some other day.

07 February 2009

Death Stamp

As if more proof was needed that the Economy sucks, The Post Office is now threatening to cut its service back to 5 days a week.
In honor of the tragedy, and as one of the few left that still use the USPS, I searched out the coolest stamp its ever issued. I'd say this one blows away the Elvis commemoratives.
It was issued in 1998, honoring the 1906 Pure Food and Drug Act.
The image is from a proprietary tax stamp for, Hunt's Remedy. It shows Hunts killing Death, thus proving how effective the product is. (This Hunts must be a medicine- not tomato sauce.)
Tax stamps were placed on the bottle by its manufacturer to show that a tax had been paid, and were often used as mini advertisements- much like pop-ups on websites.
Hunt's Remedy was one of thousands of such products flooding the U.S. market at the time the 1906 Pure Food and Drugs Act was passed.
Digg! My Zimbio